because it sounds like some vague literary term, or a pernicious disease

Archive for the ‘now this, I like’ Category

Will The Real Lady Chatterley Please Stand Up?

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I picked up a copy of Roxana Shirazi’s The Last Living Slut today. I don’t know what really compelled me to do so, I usually stay away from such things, preferring my titillating literature be some crappy romance rag. But I picked it up none the less. I was reading it out in the car on my lunch break, my legs sticking out the window in a vain attempt to get some colour and munching merrily on a brie and veggie sandwich. A tomato slice fell on my white skirt.

I was going to write this post a long time ago, actually when I first wrote about D.H. Lawerence’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover here. This was going to be the very next one, although it wouldn’t have been quite like this. I was going to write about how the fictional Lady Chatterley was actually a real person, who actually happened to be quite an influence on the writer’s of her time, she is immortalized as a character in no less than five works of fiction, most notoriously as Lady Constance Chatterley.

But as I was sitting in my car I found my nutty little brain drawing these imaginary parallel lines between the Last Living Slut, Roxana and Lady Ottoline Morrell. Separated by nearly a century they are not so very different, call them what you will, patron, inspiration, muse, groupie, slut.

Back in the day, say around the turn of the century or so, the bad-boys of the world were the poets, the writers and the artists. If you wanted debauchery and dirty loving, that is who you hung out with. Today it’s the rock stars, the writers take a bit of a backseat to accessibility of the rock star, there’s a certain draw I suppose, the rock stars get all the dirty loving and the writers sit there suffering to make deadline, or even get published. Maybe, I don’t really know, I’m not talented.

Lawerence’s Lady Chattereley’s Lover is allegedly based on Lady Ottoline Morrell’s love affair with a stonemason named “Tiger”. It follows of course, the good lady’s romance and growth within the relationship and how she comes to learn that one cannot be all mind, nor all body, but must strike a balance which can only be found in true love. Ottoline, an incurable romantic had many love affairs and kept a circle of writers and artists around her, offering hospitality and friendship that resulted her literary immortalization.

Ottoline Morrell is an extremely interesting person to me, because she seems as though she is the type that creative individuals were drawn to, obviously she inspired and encouraged their work,  but she was also interesting and charismatic enough to become their work.

She appears in two of D.H. Lawerence’s novels, Lady Chatterley of course, but also in Women in Love, where her character strikes her lover in the head and sends him running naked through a forest after he spurns her. She is Mrs. Bidlake in Aldous Huxley’s Point Counter Point, Lady Caroline Bury in Graham Greene’s It’s a Battlefield, and Lady Syballine Quarrell in Alan Bennett’s Forty Years On. It’s quite the legacy.

I haven’t finished Roxana’s The Last Living Slut yet, but I can’t help but think about Lady Morrell when I read her book, she talks about a desire to be with people which is utterly romantic, it’s there, all hidden in her stories of female ejaculation and getting peed on by Avenged Sevenfold, it’s there. The interesting thing is, Roxana’s rock stars seem to want to be around her as much as Ottoline’s writers wanted to be around her. They are similar in their appeal, their romantic qualities and magnetic personalities.

Also, a post script here, I find it incredibly serendipitous that Roxana dedicated her book to a “Tiger”.


Mustache Dude Will Ruin Your Hot Lesbian Sex Every Time

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Bram Stroker wrote Dracula in 1897. But before Dracula there was Carmilla. Carmilla was written in 1872 by J. Sheridan Le Fanu and serves to prove the point there really no originality in writer’s craft.

Touted as a ‘substantial contribution to the vampire legend in supernatural fiction’ Carmilla is little known and certainly not referenced in the legends and sparkling vampiric romances that we have so readily available today. Which is a shame because Carmilla was way ahead of her time. Today we get to read about Edward and Bella saving it for marriage, although I personally believe that the Twilight series is really about the hard choice between necrophilia and bestiality that every 18-year-old girl in Washington state must face, I digress. Carmilla however gets right down to the gritty truth of vampire lore: hot girl on girl blood sucking action.

Carmilla is a vampire love story that is centered around the relationship between two young women, Laura and Carmilla. Laura has a dream about Carmilla when she is a child and tells her father that a beautiful woman entered her bedroom and bit her on the chest. Years later when Laura is eighteen, she and Carmilla meet in real life and instantly recognize each other. Guess what happens next? Carmilla enters Laura’s bedroom and bites her on the chest, kinky bitch. Carmilla is found out to be a vampire and instead of letting these two have their torrid love affair, Carmilla is destroyed. Which is of course all cloaked in moral lessons which are just as true today as they were in 1872, a.) sex before marriage is bad b.) women are evil and c.) girl on girl will make more money than anything else you can possibly put out there.

Mustache dude does not approve.

The reason that I know this is intended to be a love story, rather than some titillating tale of how evil women are when they are unmarried and without the influence of men, is because even after Carmilla is killed, Laura still longs for her, thinking that she hears her footsteps on the stairs. This perhaps was a literary device intended to scare the reader that OMG THE LESBIAN VAMPIRE ISN’T DEAD!!! Really it just serves to underline the point that had Carmilla and Laura just been left alone, they likely would have lived happily together in some little country house and collected cats.

Written by Lindsey

June 3, 2010 at 7:03 pm

A Poor Player, That Struts and Frets

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The Sound and The Fury.

A few perspectives, brought to you by the awesome power of the internet.